The Latest #9

Back in the saddle this week... Last week, I was in Niagara Falls, so this list didn't get done.

The Latest Installation:  A new windshield on my HHR.  The glass tech said he likes to install HHR windshields.  (They're smaller and easier to handle... also go in fast.)  Yet another reason to love my HHR!

The Latest Installation, Part II:  The Rabbit Proofing around my garden.  I got the chicken wire installed on Thursday before the storms came, and it's still standing.  However, the true test will be to see if I have any peas left by harvest time.  I saw that the damn wascally wabbits ate a number of my pea plants.  Bastiges!!!

The Latest 'That's Enough Already!':  The effin' rain.  Do I really need to say more?  It has rained every day this week, and sometimes, more than the RDA (Recommended Daily Allowance) for rain, in my opinion. It has been a week since I've cut the grass, and YES, it really needs it.  (No, the Lawn Mowing Disease isn't prevalent right now -- they all did it earlier in the week.)  Problem is that the back yard is too effin' soggy to mow.  

The Latest 'Oh Shit, That Ain't Right!':  I had just started to make dinner Thursday night (during one of the many super-duper thunderstorms), when I heard an odd leaking sound over my radio in the kitchen.  I turned off the radio and listened some more.  Was it in the basement?  Was it the roof somewhere?  The garage?  Oh no, it was my fireplace.  See, we have a gas-log fireplace, so we don't have a traditional chimney.  On the outside of the house is a little area that juts out to allow the space for the fireplace and there's a vent.  Somehow, the rain + the wind + the beat-the-shit-out-of-everything mentality of the storm forced water up and under some part of that jut-out area and I found myself trying to stop up a leak in my fireplace.  Oh no, it was too small a space to place something like a bucket or even a recycled butter bowl, or hell, a Dixie cup.  I had to place and replace, etc., paper towels in the area until the storm died down and the water stopped coming in to visit.  WTF??!??  There were signs inside there that showed that this has happened before, but I don't think it happens too often -- the conditions have to be just right -- but still, now I will be worrying about it each and every time it rains.  Greeeaaattt!  HAPPY HAPPY HOMEOWNER AM I!!!

The Latest Appendage Issue:  After stopping up the fireplace leak, I returned to making dinner and I opened a can of butter beans (mmmmmm!) and was attempting to get the last bits of them out of the can with a spoon when the lid (which was hanging on by that little metal thread that often refuses to be cut when you open a can) decided to drop down into my hand's range of motion and slice the ever-living fuck out of my right index finger -- under the nail.  Umm, God?  Will you please stop laughing now and stop inflicting me with shit???  Please and thanks.

The Latest Reason Why I Didn't Answer the Front Door:  Jehovah's Witnesses.  The doorbell rang this morning at 10:30 and I looked out my office window in the front of the house to discover that there were no cars in the drive, so that meant I wasn't going to haul my ass down the stairs to answer the door.  Good thing, too, as two nicely-dressed women with bags o'literature walked away a few minutes later.  I'm sorry, but I don't think there's anything that I love and believe in enough to go door-to-door, preaching the values of whatever it is and why you should commit yourself to it as well.  I've found that most people don't like religion shoved on them... but that's just me.

Oh look!  It's starting to cloud up outside again!!!  Maybe we'll get more rain!!!  Lawd knows we need more rain!!!  Hell, I'm never going to cut my grass again so I can bale it for hay and make a dollah or two, no?  My neighbors would looooove that.

Anyway, that's it for this week's edition of The Latest.